INFJs process the script of life very differently. A lot of it is unconscious narrative and almost beyond the reach of the INFJ themselves. On the outside they can look like everybody else, however existential eternal type questions are being digested all the time. These questions require the deep in order to process. However the processing in some ways is just out of reach for the INFJ, who keeps one Ni on it at all times.
INFJs need to build trust in Ni, as the conclusions, insights, thoughts, wonderings, and so on, that Ni comes up with, are hard for others to accept, as they are not backed up by logic as others understand it. The trusting in Ni is a process, and requires testing out the insights on others to help hone its accuracy. Building trust in it is a process.
Life can sometimes take dramatic turns when deep wonderings are answered or a sudden realisation occurs. Dramatic reshaping can take place, or you could say the realisation is a changing of the INFJ as they surrender to the truth revealed. The INFJ trusts Ni more than anything else. Ni knows best.
INFJs can have a culture door slam, making sudden changes to adjust to the unconscious narrative that is leading them, once a piece of it is gifted to the INFJ. Conscious awareness of the narrative is a sign that they are ready for it.
When viewed from the outside, INFJs follow a similar life direction to others; school, university, finding the right job, marriage etc. But how this direction takes place internally is a very different story. Ni turns general life directions and patterns upside down. For the INFJ, even the most basic of decisions, circumstances and events have deep and rich meanings. Often when the INFJ is with others, the INFJ is swimming in this Ni narrative, viewing the ordinary with an extraordinary complexity.
Due to this complexity, for the INFJ it can appear as though others are joined together on a specific or common level of consciousness. A group discussion can sometimes look like a role play, with each member of the group contributing to the narrative in a way that leads to a predictable conclusion.
The INFJ likes to take a presenting narrative and go off exploring it all and much more. Due to their unorthodox way of processing information, INFJs often feel like outsiders; even to those they value and who value them. The INFJ yearns for interaction that matches their own way of processing.
INFJs spend most of their time deep below the surface, where the conscious and unconscious congregate. This is where the INFJ lives, breathes and creates, and is most comfortable. From the surface it looks like nothing is going on down there, however much is going on. Down below is where the INFJ is when they are alone, and with others. From the deep, the INFJ ponders the sensory world, analysing, wondering, questioning, yearning, grieving, and rejoicing.
The INFJ likes to visit the sensory world as part of self-regulation. Even when the visit is for casual reasons, the visit ties into the deeper narrative that the INFJ is trying to knit together and understand. It could be said that the INFJ visits the sensory world on behalf of Ni, as Ni requires the Se exposure to enable further Ni processing. During these visits, Fe facilitates exploration by warmly engaging and following the social customs, in order to gather new and valuable information.
While on the surface, the INFJ is unconsciously looking for someone that shares a similar frequency, however the INFJ’s unassuming presence can act like a camouflage. This camouflage looks after the INFJ, but can get in the way of connection (like an astronaut’s space suit). As such, their Ni frequency gets lost and distorted in the Se world, making mutual Ni connection unlikely.
While INFJs live well below the surface, they can also feel like an alien who has taken a host body to observe and study the behaviours of the earth people. Studying them and going away to the safety of the mothership to develop theories of them. While watching a movie about aliens who come to check out earth, superimposing the INFJ archetype over the alien can be a helpful visual to understand how an INFJ feels and looks at the world. But they (INFJs) really do come in peace.
For those looking to spot and INFJ in the world, look for someone who is fitting in from an observational perspective, but who is not following the popular narrative; not speaking when you think they should, not saying the predictable lines that support the popular narrative, laughs at odd times, says something that does not seem to have any logical backing to it, or says something that causes the group to go quiet for a moment.
If you are lucky enough to spot an INFJ in the world, the best way to catch them is to make them feel comfortable, and be curious about them. This is not an easy task as the sensory world takes its toll on the INFJ well before they have a chance to be recognised.
For the INFJ, the Se world is rough and unsophisticated when compared with Ni ideals. The waves of people’s unconsciousness get too loud, overwhelming and disorientating. INFJs trust their own frequency and so, tired and yet fulfilled, return to the depth alone to continue processing. They spend a long time down there.
It is this combination of Ni depth and Se exposure, that INFJ develop complex theories and observations of the world. Sometimes the ideal can only exist in the INFJ’s head, so INFJs spend time there, helping to generate theories of the world that may help bring the ideal to the world.
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Scott Morgan is a professional Counsellor and a certified Myers-Briggs Type Indicator practitioner. To make a booking enquiry click here, or to find out more about what we do click here.